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03-May-2017 13:23

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Men, you don’t have to be rich and you don’t have to climb corporate ladders. But it’s time to take a little initiative–in the church, with your career, and with women. It’s probably a good idea to be more like your grandpa and less like Captain Jack Sparrow. It is time for Christians to start talking about dating. Establishing principles for Christian dating will set men and women on a course towards Christ-centered marriages. Here are 10 important principles for Christian dating. That would make God a gambler, and the Bible clearly says gambling is from the devil (only joking). Marriage isn’t as much about finding someone totally compatible as it is about committing to someone despites difficulties and differences. I fear this mentality in the dating culture is actually promoting divorce. Suddenly, when marriage begins, you are asked to flip a switch. It allows you to jump into marriage with a clear conscience. Most importantly, guidelines and principles for dating will transform lives and shape eternities. The brokenness you see in yourself and the brokenness you experience from your spouse point both of you to the only perfect one, God. When you pull the trigger, these balls spread over a large range, increasing the chance you hit the target. The truth is you could spend your life with more than one person. Get to know yourself.” And as soon as the person you are dating smacks his or her gum the wrong way, you are out. I heard don’t have sex before marriage so much I actually believed getting to marriage a virgin was the only important thing. In the process, I filled my heart and mind with lust, and I secretly struggled with pornography. Christians, instead, need to teach the importance of a pure mind. Make sure God is the center of your life before you start dating. Don’t start dating without an assurance of God’s love for you and a solid understanding of the gospel. And yet, it is taking couples longer and longer to get around to marriage. Go to almost any church and you’ll meet mature, intelligent, attractive Christian women who want to get married and virtually no men to pursue them. On the other end of the spectrum, some women may be so over-eager to be married they make guys nervous about showing any signs of interest.These women are often in graduate programs and may have started a career already. They are eager to embrace the roles of wife and mother. There is a fine line between anticipation and desperation. A guy who can winsomely take initiative and lead a conversation. A guy who no longer works at his play and plays with his faith. A guy they can imagine providing for a family, praying with the kids at bedtime, mowing the lawn on Saturday, and being eager to take everyone to church on Sunday. The second issue is that we may simply not have enough men in the church.If you are married, pray for the single people in your church, for those never married and those divorced or widowed.All people everywhere, pray for ways to start serving the Lord now, no matter what stage of life you are in or wish you were in.

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Grab them young and get them growing up in their teens instead of their twenties. Maybe because they’ve read and figure I’ll be a sympathetic ear. They often follow up their initial question by exhorting me, “Please speak to the men in our generation and tell them to be men.” They’re talking about marriage.Recently, William Bennett’s CNN article “Why Men Are in Trouble” has garnered widespread attention. If you are dating someone who doesn’t have a personal relationship with Christ, you are playing with fire. Don’t let the relationship progress to a physical point and then hope you can cut it off later. You need all the help you can get in today’s world. Do you depend on Him to meet your needs of love and security?

If you can’t stand the person but have a great physical relationship, rethink the relationship. If one person is uncomfortable with any type of physical expression, don’t do it. Don’t push a date to do anything that makes him/her feel uncomfortable.

Physical touch/intimacy should correspond with commitment. This doesn’t mean anything goes if you are engaged. What is your motivation -- power and control, gratifying your own ego, meeting a selfish need, or genuine affection?

This issue shapes our young people, friends, and family more than we could ever. Establishing principles for Christian dating will set men and women on a.… continue reading »

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